Improve the Shining Moments

On Saturday I received a call from my sister, Allison, letting me know that my sister, Mindy, had slipped from this life and on to the next at 8:35pm. All day Saturday Mindy did not open her eyes or speak. She was pretty much incoherent. My mother, who had been sitting by her all day, was preparing to go to Mindy's house to get some sleep. She leaned down close to Mindy's face and said, "Mindy, I'm going to go now. I will be back in the morning." At that time a tear left Mindy's eye and fell down her cheek and she stopped breathing. My brother, Stan, Sister-in-law, Brenna, and nephew, Markie, were also in the room.
On Sunday at church the opening song was "Improve the Shining Moments." You can imagine my emotions as I sang:

Verse 2: Time flies on wings of lightning;
We cannot call it back.
It comes, then passes forward
Along its onward track.
And if we are not mindful,
The chance will fade away,
For life is quick in passing.
'Tis as a single day.

Verse 3: Improve each shining moment.
In this you are secure,
For promptness bringeth safety
And blessings rich and pure.
Let prudence guide your actions;
Be honest in your heart;
And God will love and bless you
And help to you impart.

That sure did speak to my heart. It was a tender mercy of the Lord, a message just for me--right there during sacrament meeting. It conveyed exactly what I was trying to say in my "Important Things" post. I quickly pulled myself together after the song because I was to teach sharing time in Primary the next two hours. Mindy was the Primary President in her ward when I was called as Primary President in my ward. I know that she was a skilled teacher. So instead of asking one of my counselors to take over this sharing time, because of my sister's passing, I decided to teach it with strength like my sister Mindy would do. I have made a promise to myself to improve the shining moments.


Mindy's Obituary

Malinda Larie Bastian Wadley 1953 ~ 2008 Malinda "Mindy" Wadley, born March 1, 1953 in Spokane, WA, passed away on November 15, 2008 in Portland, OR, at age 55, after a battle with cancer. Funeral services will be held on Saturday, November 22, 2008 at 2 p.m. at the Gabriel Park Ward, Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, located at 6605 SW Garden Home Road in Portland, arrangements by Young's Funeral Home. Interment will be at Pleasant Grove Utah City Cemetery, 500 N Main St., on Tuesday, November 25, following a graveside service at 1 p.m. Mindy was raised in Colville, WA, and graduated from Colville High School as valedictorian of the Class of 1971. A girl of many talents, Mindy was very involved in school activities and was elected the first female student body officer (vice president) at CHS. Mindy represented the city of Colville as Princess Malinda in the Colville Royalty, 1970-71. Mindy attended both Brigham Young University and Washington State University before moving to Seattle, WA, where she worked for 18 years, first as a bookkeeper, and later as manager of the Seattle Clinic of Medicine. For the past 15 years, she was the Billing Coordinator at OHSU's University Fertility Consultants in Portland. Mindy was an active member of the Gabriel Park Ward, serving in many capacities to the benefit of her fellow church members. She married Stephen A. Wadley on August 17, 1991, in the Manti Temple. Mindy's father, June Bastian, preceded her in death in 2002. Survivors include her husband, Stephen Wadley, Portland, OR; mother, Pauline Bastian, American Fork, UT; sisters, Michele "Shelly" Glaus, Gilbert, AZ; Cherisse Jaeger, American Fork, UT; Teresa Collette, Seattle, WA; Allison Routt, American Fork, UT; Krista Salisbury, Basin City, WA; and Rachel LeBaron, Spanish Fork, UT; brothers, Stanton Bastian, El Dorado, CA and Brett Bastian, Wilsonville, OR; 50 nieces and nephews, 19 grandnieces and grandnephews, and numerous aunts and uncles. Funeral arrangements in Utah by Olpin Family Mortuary. - See more at: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/deseretnews/obituary.aspx?pid=120433156#sthash.p786iOqe.dpuf

Important Things

The important things in life come into focus when death arrives at your doorstep. Today I received a call from my Mother telling me that my oldest sister, Mindy, will not win her fight with cancer. Thoughts flooded my brain. Why didn't I visit her more often? Why didn't I call more often? Am I a slave to busy-ness? I try to live my life with no regrets, but I failed on this one. Seeing these regrets makes me realize that more regrets are in my future if I don't make some changes. Taking the time to express love and to "catch up" will leave no regrets. I called her tonight to tell her that I love her. She heard me. With a feeding tube down her throat she said as good as she could, "I love you too."

My Beautiful Mother

My Mother made a quick visit to my house before attending her mission reunion in Spanish Fork. I got to do her make-up for the event. She is a beautiful and gracious model. My mother is a remarkable woman. I feel so blessed to have been her daughter. I am her youngest child--the nineth of nine. Heavenly Father knew that I needed her. I am constantly trying to be more like my Mother.

You may not believe me when I say that in my 32 years of life I have never heard my mother raise her voice in anger. That's right. Never. When my two oldest sisters were little girls, she heard one of them put her doll to bed in a strict manner. When my Mom heard her, she realized she was looking in the mirror. She decided then and there that she would never raise her voice again. And she never did.She is peace personified. To be around her is to feel at peace, unrushed, and tranquil. While she was on her mission I missed her so much that I drove to her house, closed myself in her bathroom and took in the surroundings. Her trinkets and personal touches were all over that bathroom. Sure, it wasn't the same as being by her, but somehow it helped me feel of her peace.

She taught me that the answer to any problem is LOVE.

She is right.

Hayden's Delicious State Map

For a state project at school Hayden made a 3 dimensional map of Washington. Hayden chose this state because it is the state I grew up in and because many people we love live in Washington.
The Cascade Mountain Range is depicted using rectangles of Hershey's candy bar. The Columbia Basin is dusted with Nestles Chocolate Quick powder.

Seattle is near where my sister, Teresa Collette, and her family (Barry, Ryan, Sean, Jill and Chad) live and where my nephew, Nathan Glaus, and his family (Joy and Oliver) lives.

Colville is my hometown. My sweet father is buried there. It is also home to the best sub sandwich shop, Mr. Sub.

The Tri-Cities is where my sister, Krista Salisbury, and her family (John, Kelsey, Lindsey, Justin, Jenna, and Jared) live.

It was great sharing memories of this great state with Hayden. It was a wonderful place to grow up!

Weston's Favorite Color

Weston has a favorite color.
He likes this shirt because it is his favortie color.

This picture was colored at church.

These pictures were colored at preschool. The church picture and the preschool pictures were colored weeks apart.

Joyful at Joy School

E is for Elephant. That is what we learned in Joy School in September. We also talked about the families that our Heavenly Father sent us to and how much they love us. Here are the boys in our group: Weston, Ben Gunderson, Isaac Bradshaw.Here are the girls in our group: Jaeda Sannar, Alexandra Finlayson, and Audrey Arndt.

Joy School is held once a week. We mothers rotate as the teacher for the week. Each week we focus on a letter, number, color, shape and value based theme. Some of our themes are: Identity and Families, Bodies and Health, Gratitude, Sharing, Service, Countries, Customs, Traditions, Choices, etc. Each child has a carpet with thier name on it where they get to sit during circle time. Thier conversations are so fun to listen to. Just last week they talked about underwear and diapers while they colored. I tried not to rudely interupt their converstion with spouts of loud laughter.

They all get along so well. Our schedule is as follows:

9:30-9:45 Arrival and Into Activity (puzzles, books, toys, sensory activity, manipulation tools, crayons, stickers, etc.)

9:45-9:50 Clean Up From Intro Activity

9:50-10:05 Circle Time (letter, number, color, shape weather, value based theme, and related activities)

10:05-10:15 Snack Time/Clean Up

10:15-10:30 Singing Time/Story Time

10:30-10:50 Art Project/Science Experiments/Game/Hands on Activity and Clean Up

10:50-11:00 Circle Time/Review

11:00 Moms come to pick up

The Amachers Visit Spanish Fork

In October Bekka and Aaron and children came to visit us! Bekka and I have been friends since childhood. We have a whole photo album of photos of us.....because my Mom liked to take pictures--and also because we liked to pose for the camera. Their family lives in Honolulu, Hawaii right now. They were itching to return to the mainland and we were so lucky to be the recipients of a visit from them during thier family vacation. I had to include this picture of Bekka eating breakfast in my kitchen. Still clad in her pajamas, this is proof that she REALLY DID come stay with us. I hadn't seen Bekka and her family in four years!

This is Amelia, Gwen, and Abby. Abby was in heaven as she and I are the only girls in our family. They had so much fun playing together.

Here is Hayden, Bastian, George and Alexander. We're used to having lots of boys at our house, so adding these two to the bunch was great.

Wii fun.

Didn't I tell you they had lots of fun together?

We got out the four wheelers so Rob and Aaron could take the kids for a spin.

Hayden and George played a game they made up with these rulers for hours.

Bekka and I went to the Womens' Broadcast together and got to go on a shopping spree to the mall. We walked a 4 mile loop into the farming area by my house. It felt like being a kid in Colville again.

Spiritual Thought: Our Children Will Need To Know

Russel M. Nelson May 2008 Ensign said, "In this day of rampant immorality and addictive pornography, parents have a sacred responsibility to teach their children the importance of God in their lives. Those evils, so highly destructive of divine potential, are to be strictly shunned by children of God."

Every week in Primary we teach simple, true doctrines. The doctrines we taught and are still teaching in 2008 are:

1. I am a child of God, and He has a plan for me.
2. The scriptures teach me about Heavenly Father
and Jesus Christ and how to return to Them.
3. Jesus Christ is my Savior.
4. I will follow the prophet.
5. Heavenly Father planned for me to come to a
family. I can strengthen my family now.
6. The temple is a blessing for me and my family.
7. Because I know we are all children of God, I will
share the gospel with others.
8. I will show my faith in Jesus Christ by being baptized
and confirmed.
9. I can pray to Heavenly Father, and He will hear
and answer my prayers.
10. Because I am His child, I will serve God with all
my heart, might, mind, and strength.
11. I am thankful to know that we are all children of
God.
12. I love my Savior, Jesus Christ, and His restored
gospel.

I have a testimony of these truths. These are from the 2008 Sharing Time Outline. It is a great resource. The songs that are taught in this day and age are different songs than the ones I learned growing up. The children are learning songs that are based upon the Savior--His ministry and His mission. The songs also teach simple, true doctrines. Gone are the days of Little Purple Pansies and In the Leafy Treetops.

Teaching children these doctrines is wisdom from the Brethren. These children need to know what the Spirit feels like. I talked to each one of my children individually of their thoughts on speaking to our Heavenly Father through prayer. I wanted to know where they were spiritually. I wanted to know if I needed to make some changes in my teaching. I found that my 10 year old and 7 year old recognize the Spirit. I was 16 before I recognized what the Spirit felt like. I had felt it many times in my life before I was 16, I just didn't recognize that it was the Spirit.

This generation will need to know. I have received questions from my 10 year old boy about abortion and same sex marriage. In a world where the adversary fights for confusion, he will need to know.

I've sat my children down and told them they will make great adults and great leaders. I want to plant this seed young. I want them to know what is expected of them and I want them to know of their potential.

As a parent I feel fear creep in at times. Am I doing enough? Do I parent with too strong of a hand or not strong enough? Am I making monumental mistakes? And then sometimes I wonder: Am I wrecking their lives? (usually on days that I've raised my voice...a lot.)

The scripture in Isaiah 41:10 helps to chase fear away. It says:

"Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness."

You may recognize this as the scriptural verse that inspired the 3rd verse to the hymn "How Firm a Foundation." I sing this song when I am afraid.

In the May 2000 Ensign Thomas S. Monson said with strength: Do not fear…….. for He will be with you. He never fails. He has promised: “I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my Spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up.”

He NEVER fails and He is WITH us.

September Top Ten

10. I asked Hayden to go take a shower. Showering is not one of his favorite pastimes. I asked him, “Why is it important to be clean?” Hayden replied, “So you can get a wife?” I said, “Showering is important so you don’t stink.” He said, “You could just use Febreze.” Then in his commentator voice he said, “CAN the shower and get Febreze today!”

9. Hayden was talking about how fun it would be to have a mansion for a home. (We already live in a mansion as far as I’m concerned) I said that I wouldn’t like it because it would require a lot of cleaning. Hayden said we could get a maid. I explained to him that this life isn’t about acquiring riches and hiring other people to clean up after us. I said if the Lord blesses us with riches I want to be able to help others--I don’t want to live in my riches. If I need help cleaning every once in a while I can hire someone to help me, but I want our family to be able to care for the things that we have. Abby said, “I don’t want a maid.” Thinking she had understood the importance of work and taking care of our own things I asked why. She said, “Because if I got in trouble I’d be embarrassed in front of the maid.”

8. Weston after a bath said, “My skin is….is……loose.”

7. The kids had a particularly hard time being reverent during Sacrament meeting one week and Rob and I had to remind them quite a few times to be quiet. While preparing dinner Rob was telling me how the Bishop had asked us (during the Sunday school lesson that he taught) to make reverence a priority in Sacrament meeting. Feeling guilty Hayden said, “He asked US specifically?” To Hayden’s relief the Bishop asked ALL families to be reverent, not just ours.

6. After throwing Hayden’s Nintendo DS down the stairs Weston said to me, “Sorry I threw Hayden’s Nintendo DS down the stairs. I forgive you.” Note to self: teach Weston what forgiveness is.

5. Rob teasing about starting yet another fad diet proclaimed one morning, “I’m starting a cleanse tomorrow.” Thinking he was serious I said forcefully, “No you’re NOT.” To which he replied, “Yes I am. I am drinking nothing but KFC grease.”

4. Bastian searching his brain for the words bed skirt said, “a tutu?”

3. Hayden likes to play a game called smiley with Weston. Hayden made up the game. Weston doesn’t love to play. Hayden sits on Weston’s tummy while holding Weston’s arms up above his head. Hayden proceeds to smile in a VERY animated and annoying fashion, bobbing his head this way and that while approaching Weston’s face. Weston kicks his legs and yells, “No, not smiley….NOT SMILEY!!!!” Hayden loves to play.

2. Weston was sick. He heard me say he caught a flu bug. He pointed to his mouth and said, “Do I have bugs?” I said, “Yes, you have germ bugs that are making you sick.” He thought for a moment, no doubt thinking about all the nice bugs he had met this summer and said, “the germ bugs will say, ‘oops, sorry.’”

1. Weston wanted Hayden out of his way. Weston pushed Hayden and hit him and then said, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.” Hayden now wants to try this technique.